Questions?

Still struggling with myself. What is life? Are we all living a dream? Are we all figments of another creatures imagination. Are we like ants in an ant farm? Being watch from afar? Is life just a bunch of lessons for what? So we can die unhappy? Or when your old and frail do you finally get a break? I'm sure if it all happens for a reason, and I have these thoughts, its for a reason. I am me for a reason. But what reason? Maybe the reason is just to die. Maybe I am meant to change lives. I feel I am only a negative impact on it all. I give great advise, how do I apply that to my own life? Why is it so hard to apply my advise to my own life? My life so far has been a viscous circle. Is this because I continuously make the same mistake? Or is something bigger out there trying to tell me something? All these questions, questions, questions. I want some answers.